Friday, July 01, 2005

Frankfort Avenue Beer Depot

Address: Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot, 3204 Frankfort Ave.

Small print: Open 10 a.m. until 1, 2, 4 a.m. … depends on the night and how busy it is.

Why you should go: Beerhalla!

I'm not sure if this is a legally binding term, but this is what anyone who knows anything will say if you mention this place.

How does one review a bar when the subject in question is hardly a bar? The question isn't posed as an insult; I'd recommend the Beer Depot to pretty much everybody, but I often forget that it's a bar.

They have beer, yes, fear not. Situated as they are in a moderately well-off residential neighborhood that's more St. Matthews than Crescent Hill, the owners of the Frankfort Avenue Beer Depot made their best decision when they installed a nine-hole miniature golf course and pingpong table in the back. Where else can you go for such activities late at night?




PHOTOS BY DURELL HALL JR.

The pingpong table dominates the back, where it becomes a focal point for all who wish to play or observe. Unlike some bars, where one pool table can turn a big room into a claustrophobic traffic jam, here the pingpong table is a benevolent king. It allows for enough room to sit and enjoy, but that is all.

You can play miniature golf, but prepare to feel like a red-headed stepchild. No one cares about your silly little game, even if there's no table tennis to watch.

Why you should think twice: Walking into the front room, the bar room, always reminds me of walking into a South Florida tourist trap, especially during the summer. Men older than you and I (and even less in touch with current fashion developments) hold court, loudly discussing those topics that are discussed only by men of a certain age, including but not limited to politics, football and "gitting-R-done".

As much as I enjoy a cold beer, sometimes I want something else. Sometimes I need something that will dull the pain of everyday life in a Red State just a little bit. The Beer Depot offers only beer. This, to me, is an offense similar to listening only to the Beatles' early records. Sure, they're pretty good, but there's even greater greatness out there.

Bottom line: You like to play sports, but you're hanging out at a bar in Louisville so you're probably not quite as good as Babe Ruth or Magic Johnson. At least you can play some pingpong while you suck down that reasonably priced beer.